Thursday, August 18, 2011

I feel like I'm living in my twin sister's shadow?

We're both juniors in high school and she's older by a few minutes. We used to be very close 'cause we shared a room together when we were younger and she was just.. My other half. My older brother moved out and went to college; so, I moved into his room. This was around middle school and we were still best friends. But when we went to high school, we started to part ways. She started to hang out with the popular people, she made the dance team(she loves dancing), and then she started to care about her looks like putting on makeup while I just became known as Hilary's boring, bland twin sister. I took honor cles during my freshmen year and sopre year and I took a few AP cles this year. People clify me as a nerd, even Hilary has. She's an average student in regular cles, sometimes getting a C in her cles. My mom calls me the smart one and Hilary the outgoing one and I know she loves us both, but sometimes I feel like she loves her more 'cause she's the girly girl and popular. I'm not a tomboy. I still like to shop, but whenever my mom and us go shopping together, Hilary is the main attention. "Hilary this would look so cute on you.... Hilary do you want to stop by Sephora?... Hilary this outfit really brings out your eyes(WE HAVE THE SAME EYES MOTHER)... Hilary I think Brandon(her boyfriend) would love this on you... And blah blah. They would forget about me and just have their own mother daughter shopping. I tried confronting my mom about this, but she just simply said but you hate shopping. seriously if you don't enjoy it, don't come. But then I told her that I liked shopping. It's just that all you care about is Hilary. Then she told me to go to my room 'cause I was "disrespecting" her. People always seem to prefer her over me like they compare us or they just forget about me. For example, I'm just over at the corner alone when our relatives visit. Like when our aunt comes over for Thanksgiving, she'll say oh my! How tall you've grown Hilary! Totally ignoring me.. I tried interfering and said Happy Thanksgiving Aunt Ruth! But then she'll just smile and Oh darling I forgot you were here! Yeah I feel so loved... The only people who don't act like I don't exist are my teachers, my friends, and my older brother. What can I do to become my own person? I want my next school year to be different.

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